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After 50 years, Ars staffers pick their favorite Saturday Night Live sketches


“Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.”

American musician Stevie Wonder (left) appears on an episode of ‘Saturday Night Live’ with comedian and actor Eddie Murphy, New York, New York, May 6, 1983. Credit: Anthony Barboza/Getty Images

American musician Stevie Wonder (left) appears on an episode of ‘Saturday Night Live’ with comedian and actor Eddie Murphy, New York, New York, May 6, 1983. Credit: Anthony Barboza/Getty Images

The venerable late-night sketch comedy show Saturday Night Live is celebrating its 50th anniversary season this year. NBC will air a special on Sunday evening featuring current and former cast members.

I’ve long been a big fan of the show, since I was a kid in the late 1980s watching cast members such as Phil Hartman, Dana Carvey, and Jan Hooks. By then, the show was more than a decade old. It had already spawned huge Hollywood stars like Chevy Chase and Eddie Murphy and had gone through some near-death experiences as it struggled to find its footing.

The show most definitely does not appeal to some people. When I asked the Ars editorial team to share their favorite sketches, a few writers told me they had never found Saturday Night Live funny, hadn’t watched it in decades, or just did not get the premise of the show. Others, of course, love the show’s ability to poke fun at the cultural and political zeitgeist of the moment.

With the rise of the Internet, Saturday Night Live has become much more accessible. If you don’t care to watch live on Saturday night or record the show, its sketches are available on YouTube within a day or two. Not all of the show’s 10,000-odd sketches from the last five decades are available online, but many of them are.

With that said, here are some of our favorites!

Celebrity Hot Tub Party (Season 9)

Saturday Night Live has a thing for hot tubs, and it starts here, with the greatest of all hot tub parties.

Should you get in the water? Will it make you sweat?

Good god!

Celebrity Hot Tub.

—Ken Fisher

Papyrus (Season 43)

Some of SNL’s best skits satirize cultural touchstones that seem like they’d be way too niche but actually resonate broadly with its audience—like Font Snobs, i.e., those people who sneer at fonts like Comic-Sans (you know who you are) in favor of more serious options like the all-time favorite Helvetica. (Seriously, Helvetica has its own documentary.)

In “Papyrus,” host Ryan Gosling played Steven, a man who becomes obsessed with the fact that the person who designed the Avatar logo chose to use Papyrus. “Was it laziness? Was it cruelty?” Why would any self-respecting graphic designer select the same font one sees all over in “hookah bars, Shakira merch, [and] off-brand teas”? The skit is played straight as a tense psychological thriller and ends with a frustrated Steven screaming, “I know what you did!” in front of the graphic designer’s house while the designer smirks in triumph.

There was even a sequel last year in which Gosling’s Steven is in a support group and seems to have recovered from the trauma of seeing the hated font everywhere—as long as he avoids triggers. Then he learns that the font for Avatar: The Way of Water is just Papyrus in bold.

So begins an elaborate plot to infiltrate a graphic designer awards event to confront his tormentor head-on. The twist: Steven achieves a personal epiphany instead and confronts the root of his trauma: the fact that he was never able to understand his father, Jonathan WingDings. “My dad was so hard to read,” a weeping Steven laments as he finally gets some much-needed closure. Like most sequels, it doesn’t quite capture the magic of the original, but it’s still a charming addition to the archive.

Papyrus.

—Jennifer Ouellette

Washington’s Dream (Season 49)

The only SNL skit known and loved by all my kids. Nate Bargatze is George Washington, who explains his dream of “liberty” to soldiers in his revolutionary army. Washington’s future America is heavy on bizarre weights, measures, and rules, though not quite so concerned about things like slavery.

Washington’s Dream.

—Nate Anderson

Commercial parodies

I’ve always been partial to SNL‘s commercial parodies, probably because I saw way too many similar (but earnest) commercials while watching terrestrial TV growing up.

The other good thing about the commercial format is that it’s hard to make them longer than about two minutes, so they don’t outstay their welcome like some other SNL sketches

It’s hard to pick just one, so I’ll give a trio, along with the bits I think about and/or quote regularly.

Old Glory Insurance: “I don’t even know why the scientists make them!” (Season 21)

Old Glory Insurance.

First Citywide Change Bank: “All the time, our customers ask us, ‘How do you make money doing this?’ The answer is simple: volume.” (Season 14)

First CityWide Change Bank.

Happy Fun Ball: “Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball” (Season 16)

Happy Fun Ball.

—Kyle Orland

Anything with Phil Hartman (Seasons 12 to 20)

Phil Hartman was a regular on Saturday Night Live throughout my high school and college years, and it was nice to know that on the rare Saturday night when I did not have a date or plans, he and the cast would be on television to provide entertainment. He was the “glue” guy during his time on the show, playing a variety of roles and holding the show together.

Here are some of his most memorable sketches, at least to me.

Anal Retentive Chef. Hartman acts as Gene, who is… well, anal retentive. He appeared in five different skits over the years. This is the first one. (Season 14)

The Anal Retentive Chef.

Hartman had incredible range. During his first year on the show, he played President Reagan, who at the time had acquired the reputation of becoming doddering and forgetful. However, as Hartman clearly shows us in this sketch, that is far from reality. (Season 12)

President Reagan, Mastermind.

And here he is a few years later, during the first year of President Clinton’s term in office. This skit also features Chris Farley, who was memorable in almost everything he appeared in. “Do you mind if I wash it down?” (Season 18)

President Bill Clinton at McDonald’s.

Kyle has noted commercial parodies above, and there are many good ones. Hartman often appeared in these because he did such a good job of playing the “straight man” character in comedy, the generally normal person in contrast to all of the wackiness happening in a scene. One of Hartman’s most famous commercials is for Colon Blow cereal. However, my favorite is this zany commercial for Jiffy Pop… Airbags. (Season 17)

Jiffy Pop Airbag.

—Eric Berger

Motherlover (Season 34)

The Lonely Island (an American comedy trio, formed by Andy Samberg, Jorma Taccone, and Akiva Schaffer, which wrote comedy music videos) had bigger, more viral hits, but nothing surpasses the subversiveness of “to me, you’re like a brother, so be my motherlover.”

Motherlover.

—Jacob May

More Cowbell (Season 25)

This classic sketch gets featured on almost all SNL “best of” lists; “more cowbell” even made it into the dictionary. It’s a sendup of VH1’s “Behind the Music,” focused on the recording of Blue Oyster Cult’s 1975 hit “Don’t Fear the Reaper,” which features a distinctive percussive cowbell in the background. Will Ferrell is perfection as fictional cowbell player Gene Frenkel, whose overly enthusiastic playing is a distraction to his bandmates. But Christopher Walken’s “legendary” (and fictional) producer Bruce Dickinson loves the cowbell, encouraging Gene to “really explore the studio space” with each successive take. “I gotta have more cowbell, baby!”

Things escalate as Gene’s playing first becomes too flamboyant, and then passive-aggressive, until the band works through its tensions and decides to embrace the cowbell after all. The comic timing is spot on, and the cast doesn’t let the joke run too long (a common flaw in lesser SNL skits). Ferrell’s physical antics and Walken’s brilliantly deadpan delivery—”I got a fever and the only prescription is more cowbell!”—has the cast on the verge of breaking character throughout. It deserves its place in the pantheon of SNL‘s best.

More Cowbell.

—Jennifer Ouellette

The Californians (Season 37-present day)

I was going to go with Old Glory Insurance as my favorite SNL skit, but since Kyle already grabbed that one, I have to fall back on some of my runners-up. And although the Microsoft Robots and Career Day and even good ol’ Jingleheimer Junction almost topped my list, ultimately, I have to give it up to the recurring SNL skit that has probably given me more joy than anything the show has done since John Belushi’s samurai librarian. I am speaking of The Californians.

This fake soap opera, featuring a cast of perpetually blonde, perpetually unfaithful, perpetually directions-obsessed California stereotypes hits me just right. The elements that get repeated in every skit (including and especially Fred Armisen’s inevitable “WHATAREYUUUUDUUUUUUUINGHERE” or the locally produced furniture that everyone makes a point of using in the second act) are the kind of absurdities that get funnier over time, and it’s awesome to see guest stars try on the hyper-SoCal accent that is mandatory for all characters in the Californians’ universe.

Special props to Kristen Wiig, too—she’s inevitably hilarious, but her incredulous line reading when Mick Jagger shows up as Stuart’s long-absent father (“STUART! You never told me you had a dad!”) can and will fully send me into doubled-over hysterics every single time.

The Californians.

—Lee Hutchinson

What’s the fuss about?

In more than 20 years of living in the United States, few things still remain as far outside my cultural frame of reference as SNL. Whenever someone makes an unintelligible joke in Slack (or IRC before it) and everyone laughs, it invariably turns out to be some SNL thing that anyone who grew up here instinctively understands.

To me, it was always just *crickets*.

—Jonathan Gitlin

Black Jeopardy (Season 42)

Kenan Thompson was the show’s first cast member born after SNL‘s premiere in 1975, and after joining the show in 2003, he has become its longest-running cast member. Whenever he is on screen, you know you’re about to see something hilarious. One of his best roles on SNL has become the “game show host,” with long-running bits on Family Feud and the absurdly hilarious Black Jeopardy. The most famous of these latter skits occurred in 2016, when Tom Hanks appeared. If you haven’t watched it, you really must.

Black Jeopardy.

—Eric Berger

Josh Acid (Season 15)

One of my favorite SNL sketches (and perhaps one of the most underrated) is an Old West send-up featuring a sheriff named “Josh Acid” (played by Mel Gibson during his hosting appearance in 1989), who keeps two bottles of acid in holsters instead of the standard six-shooter revolvers.

The character is a hero in his town, but when he throws acid on people, their skin melts, and they die a horrible, gruesome death. The townspeople witness one such death and say it’s “gross.” In response, the main character cites Jim Bowie using a Bowie knife and says, “I use acid because that’s my name.” At one point, Kevin Nealon, as the bartender, says the town is grateful he’s cleaned up the place, but “it’s just that we’re not sure which is worse: lawlessness, or having to watch people die horribly from acid.”

Later, when a woman asks Josh to choose between her or acid, he says, “Frida, I took a job, and that job’s not done until every criminal in this territory is either behind bars or melted down.”

The sketch is just absurdly ridiculous in a delightful way, and it gleefully subverts the stoic nobility of the stereotypical Western hero, which is a trope baby boomers grew up with on TV. If I were to stretch, I’d also say it works because it lampoons the idea that some methods of legally or rightfully killing someone are more honorable and socially acceptable than others.

It’s not on YouTube that I can find, but I found a copy on TikTok.

—Benj Edwards

Hidden Camera Commercials (Season 17)

For me—and, I suspect, most people—there are several “golden ages” of SNL. But if I had to pick just one, it would be the Chris Farley era. The crown jewel of Farley’s SNL tenure was certainly the Bob Odenkirk- penned “Van Down by the River.” Today, though, I’d like to highlight a deeper cut: a coffee commercial in which Farley’s character is told he is drinking decaf coffee instead of regular. Instead of being delighted that he can’t tell the difference in taste, he gets… ANGRY.

Farley’s incredulous “what?” and dawning rage at being deceived never fail to make me laugh.

Hidden Camera Commercials.

—Aaron Zimmerman

Wake Up and Smile (Season 21)

SNL loves to take a simple idea and repeat it—sometimes without enough progression. But “Wake Up and Smile” stands out by following its simple idea (perky morning show hosts are lost without their teleprompters) into an incredibly dark place. In six minutes, you can watch the polished veneer of civilization collapse into tribal violence, all within the absurdist confines of a vapid TV show. In the end, everyone wakes from their temporary dystopian dreamland. Well, except for the weatherman.

Wake Up and Smile

—Nate Anderson

Thanks, Nate, and everyone who contributed. Indeed, one of the joys of watching the show live is you never know when a sketch is going to dark or very, very dark.

Photo of Eric Berger

Eric Berger is the senior space editor at Ars Technica, covering everything from astronomy to private space to NASA policy, and author of two books: Liftoff, about the rise of SpaceX; and Reentry, on the development of the Falcon 9 rocket and Dragon. A certified meteorologist, Eric lives in Houston.

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streaming-used-to-make-stuff-networks-wouldn’t-now-it-wants-safer-bets.

Streaming used to make stuff networks wouldn’t. Now it wants safer bets.


Opinion: Streaming gets more cable-like with new focus on live events, mainstream content.

A scene from The OA. Credit: Netflix

There was a time when it felt like you needed a streaming subscription in order to contribute to watercooler conversations. Without Netflix, you couldn’t react to House of Cards’ latest twist. Without Hulu, you couldn’t comment on how realistic The Handmaid’s Tale felt, and you needed Prime Video to prefer The Boys over the latest Marvel movies. In the earlier days of streaming, when streaming providers were still tasked with convincing customers that streaming was viable, streaming companies strived to deliver original content that lured customers.

But today, the majority of streaming services are struggling with profitability, and the Peak TV era, a time when TV programming budgets kept exploding and led to iconic original series like Game of Thrones, is over. This year, streaming companies are pinching pennies. This means they’re trying harder to extract more money from current subscribers through ads and changes to programming strategies that put less emphasis on original content.

What does that mean for streaming subscribers, who are increasingly paying more? And what does it mean for watercooler chat and media culture when the future of TV increasingly looks like TV’s past, with a heightened focus on live events, mainstream content, and commercials?

Streaming offered new types of shows and movies—from the wonderfully weird to uniquely diverse stories—to anyone with a web connection and a few dollars a month. However, more conservative approaches to original content may cause subscribers to miss out on more unique, niche programs that speak to diverse audiences and broader viewers’ quirkier interests.

Streaming companies are getting more stingy

To be clear, streaming services are expected to spend more on content this year than last year. Ampere Analysis predicted in January that streaming services’ programming budgets will increase by 0.4 percent in 2025 to $248 billion. That’s slower growth than what occurred in 2024 (2 percent), which was fueled by major events, including the 2024 Summer Olympics and US presidential election. Ampere also expects streaming providers to spend more than linear TV channels will on content for the first time ever this year. But streaming firms are expected to change how they distribute their content budgets, too.

Peter Ingram, research manager at Ampere Analysis, expects that streaming services will spend about 35 percent on original scripted programming in 2025, down from 45 percent in 2022, per Ampere’s calculations.

Amazon Prime Video is reportedly “buying fewer film and TV projects than they have in the past,” according to a January report from The Information citing eight unnamed producers who are either working with or have worked with Amazon in the last two years. The streaming service has made some of the most expensive original series ever and is reportedly under pressure from Amazon CEO Andy Jassy to reach profitability by the end of 2025, The Information said, citing two unnamed sources. Prime Video will reportedly focus more on live sports events, which brings revenue from massive viewership and ads (that even subscribers to Prime Video’s ad-free tier will see).

Amazon has denied The Information’s reporting, with a spokesperson claiming that the number of Prime Video projects “grew from 2023 to 2024” and that Prime Video expects “the same level of growth” in 2025. But after expensive moves, like Amazon’s $8.5 billion MGM acquisition and projects with disproportionate initial returns, like Citadel, it’s not hard to see why Prime Video might want to reduce content spending, at least temporarily.

Prime Video joins other streaming services in the push for live sports to reach or improve profitability. Sports rights accounted for 4 percent of streaming services’ content spending in 2021, and Ampere expects that to reach 11 percent in 2025, Ingram told Ars:

These events offer services new sources of content that have pre-built fan followings, (helping to bring in new users to a platform) while also providing existing audiences with a steady stream of weekly content installments to help them remain engaged long-term.

Similarly, Disney, whose content budget includes theatrical releases and content for networks like The Disney Channel in addition to what’s on Disney+, has been decreasing content spending since 2022, when it spent $33 billion. In 2025, Disney plans to spend about $23 billion on content. Discussing the budget cut with investors earlier this month, CFO Hugh Johnston said Disney’s focused “on identifying opportunities where we’re spending money perhaps less efficiently and looking for opportunities to do it more efficiently.”

Further heightening the importance of strategic content spending for streaming businesses is the growing number of services competing for subscription dollars.

“There has been an overall contraction within the industry, including layoffs,” Dan Green, director of the Master of Entertainment Industry Management program at Carnegie Mellon University’s Heinz College & College of Fine Arts, told Ars. “Budgets are looked at more closely and have been reined in.”

Peacock, for example, has seen its biggest differentiator come not from original series (pop quiz: what’s your favorite Peacock original?) but from the Summer Olympics. A smaller streaming service compared to Netflix or Prime Video, Peacock’s spending on content went from tripling from 2021 to 2023 to an expected 12 percent growth rate this year and 3 percent next year, per S&P Global Market Intelligence. The research firm estimated last year that original content will represent less than 25 percent of Peacock’s programming budget over the next five years.

Tyler Aquilina, a media analyst at the Variety Intelligence Platform (VIP+) research firm, told me that smaller services are more likely to reduce original content spending but added:

Legacy media companies like Disney, NBCUniversal, Paramount, and Warner Bros. Discovery are, to a certain degree, in the same boat as Netflix: the costs of sports rights keep rising, so they will need to spend less on other content in order to keep their content budgets flat or trim them.

Streaming services are getting less original

Data from entertainment research firm Luminate’s 2024 Year-End Film & TV Report found a general decline in the number of drama series ordered by streaming services and linear channels between 2019 (304) and 2024 (285). The report also noted a 27 percent drop in the number of drama series episodes ordered from 2019 (3,393) to 2024 (2,492).

Beyond dramas, comedy series orders have been declining the past two years, per Luminate’s data. From 2019 to 2024, “the number of total series has declined by 39 percent, while the number of episodes/hours is down by 47 percent,” Luminate’s report says.

And animated series “have been pummeled over the past few years to an all-time low” with the volume of cartoons down 31 percent in 2024 compared to 2023, per the report.

The expected number of new series releases this year, per Luminate. Credit: Luminate Film & TV

Aquilina at VIP+, a Luminate sister company, said: “As far as appealing to customers, the reality is that the enormous output of the Peak TV era was not a successful business strategy; Luminate data has shown original series viewership on most platforms (other than Netflix) is often concentrated among a small handful of shows.” While Netflix is slightly increasing content spending from 2024 to 2025, it’s expected that “less money will be going toward scripted originals as the company spends more on sports rights and other live events,” the analyst said.

Streaming services struggle to make money with original content

The streaming industry is still young, meaning companies are still determining the best way to turn streaming subscriptions into successful businesses. The obvious formula of providing great content so that streamers get more subscribers and make more money isn’t as direct as it seems. One need only look at Apple TV+’s critically acclaimed $20 billion library that only earned 0.3 percent of US TV screen viewing time in June 2024, per Nielsen, to understand the complexities of making money off of quality content.

When it comes to what is being viewed on streaming services, the top hits are often things that came out years ago or are old network hits, such as Suits, a USA Network original series that ended in 2019 and was the most-streamed show in 2023, per Nielsen, or The Big Bang Theory, a CBS show that ended in 2019 and was the most binged show in 2024, per Nielsen, or Little House on the Prairie, which ended in 1983 and Nielsen said was streamed for 13.25 billion minutes on Peacock last year.

There’s also an argument for streaming services to make money off low-budget (often old) content streamed idly in the background. Perceived demand for background content is considered a driver for growing adoption of free ad-supported streaming TV (FAST) channels like Tubi and the generative AI movies that TCL’s pushing on its FAST channels.

Meanwhile, TVs aren’t watched the way they used to be. Social media and YouTube have gotten younger audiences accustomed to low-budget, short videos, including videos summarizing events from full-length original series and movies. Viral video culture has impacted streaming and TV viewing, with YouTube consistently dominating streaming viewing time in the US and revealing this week that TVs are the primary device used to watch YouTube. Companies looking to capitalize on these trends may find less interest in original, high-budget scripted productions.

The wonderfully weird at risk

Streaming opened the door for many shows and movies to thrive that would likely not have been made or had much visibility through traditional distribution means. From the wonderfully weird like The OA and Big Mouth, to experimental projects like Black Mirror: Bandersnatch, to shows from overseas, like Squid Game, and programs that didn’t survive on network TV, like Futurama, streaming led to more diverse content availability and surprise hits than what many found on broadcast TV.

If streaming services are more particular about original content, the result could be that subscribers miss out on more of the artistic, unique, and outlandish projects that helped make streaming feel so exciting at first. Paramount, for example, said in 2024 that a reduced programming budget would mean less local-language content in foreign markets and more focus on domestic hits with global appeal.

Carnegie Mellon University’s Green agreed that tighter budgets could potentially lead to “less diverse storytelling being available.”

“What will it take for a new, unproven storyteller (writer) to break through without as many opportunities available? Instead, there may be more emphasis on outside licensed content, and perhaps some creators will be drawn to bigger checks from some of the larger streamers,” he added.

Elizabeth Parks, president and CMO at Parks Associates, a research firm focused on IoT, consumer electronics, and entertainment, noted that “many platforms are shifting focus toward content creation rather than new curated, must-watch originals,” which could create a”more fragmented, less compelling viewer experience with diminishing differentiation between platforms.”

As streaming services more aggressively seek live events, like award shows and sporting events, and scripted content with broader appeal, they may increasingly mirror broadcast TV.

“The decision by studios to distribute their own content to competitors… shows how content is being monetized beyond just driving direct subscriptions,” Parks said. “This approach borrows from traditional TV syndication models and signals a shift toward maximizing content value over time, instead of exclusive content.”

Over the next couple of years, we can expect streaming services to be more cautious about content investments. Services will be less interested in providing a bounty of original exclusives and more focused on bottom lines. They will need “to ensure that spend does not outpace revenues, and platforms can maintain attractive profit margins,” Ampere’s Ingram explained. Original hit shows will still be important, but we’ll likely see fewer gambles and more concerted efforts toward safer bets at mainstream appeal.

For streaming customers who are fatigued with the number of services available and dissatisfied with content quality, it’s a critical time for streaming services to prove that they’re an improvement over other traditional TV and not just giving us the same ol’, same ol’.

“The streaming services that most appeal to customers host robust libraries of content that people want to watch, and as long as that’s the case, they’ll continue to do so. That’s why Netflix and Disney are still the top streamers,” Ingram said.

Photo of Scharon Harding

Scharon is a Senior Technology Reporter at Ars Technica writing news, reviews, and analysis on consumer gadgets and services. She’s been reporting on technology for over 10 years, with bylines at Tom’s Hardware, Channelnomics, and CRN UK.

Streaming used to make stuff networks wouldn’t. Now it wants safer bets. Read More »

wheel-of-time-s3-trailer-tees-us-up-for-last-battle

Wheel of Time S3 trailer tees us up for Last Battle

After defeating Ishamael, one of the most powerful of the Forsaken, at the end of Season Two, Rand reunites with his friends in the city of Falme and is declared the Dragon Reborn. But in Season Three, the threats against the Light are multiplying: the White Tower stands divided, the Black Ajah run free, old enemies return to the Two Rivers, and the remaining Forsaken are in hot pursuit of the Dragon… including Lanfear, whose relationship with Rand will mark a crucial choice between Light and Dark for them both.

Prime Video released a one-minute teaser for The Wheel of Time at CCXP24 in Sao Paulo, Brazil, in December. That teaser was notable for Moraine’s prediction concerning her and Rand’s intertwined fates: “In every future where I lived, Rand dies. And the only way he lives is if I don’t.”

The full trailer reiterates that prediction and gives us glimpses of a battle breaking out in the White Tower, the port city of Tanchico, and growing tension between Rand and Egwene (Madeleine Madden), who is troubled by Rand’s romantic entanglement with Lanfear (Natasha O’Keeffe), a powerful member of the Forsaken who hopes to seduce Rand to the Shadow. It’s all gearing up for Rand’s destiny to fight in the Last Battle.

The first three episodes of the third season of The Wheel of Time premiere on March 13, 2025, with episodes airing weekly after that through April 17.

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“a-sicker-america”:-senate-confirms-robert-f-kennedy-jr.-as-health-secretary

“A sicker America”: Senate confirms Robert F. Kennedy Jr. as health secretary

The US Senate on Thursday confirmed the long-time anti-vaccine advocate Robert F. Kennedy Jr. as Secretary of Health and Human Services.

The vote was largely along party lines, with a tally of 52 to 48. Sen. Mitch McConnell (R–Ky.), a polio survivor and steadfast supporter of vaccines, voted against the confirmation, the only Republican to do so.

Before the vote, Minority Leader Charles Schumer (D–N.Y.) claimed that if there had been a secret ballot today, most Republicans would have voted against Kennedy. “But sadly, and unfortunately for America, Republicans are being strong-armed by Donald Trump and will end up holding their nose and voting to confirm Mr. Kennedy… What a travesty,” Schumer said.

Senator Mike Crapo (R–Idaho) shot back, supporting Kennedy’s nomination and chastising his colleagues for their continued “attacks” on Kennedy. “He has made it very clear that he will support safe vaccinations and just wants to see that the research on them is done and done well,” Crapo said, seemingly not acknowledging the vast wealth of high-quality research that has already been done on vaccine safety and efficacy.

As the top health official for the Trump administration, Kennedy says he will focus on improving nutrition and reducing chronic diseases, in part by cracking down on food additives, processed foods, and the influence of food and drug makers on federal agencies. Prior to his confirmation, he campaigned on the slogan “Make America Healthy Again,” aka MAHA, which he has moved to trademark.

Anti-vaccine advocacy

While his stated goals have drawn support and praise from some lawmakers and health advocates, his confirmation has been highly controversial because he is one of the most prominent and influential anti-vaccine advocates in the country. He has worked for decades to erode trust in safe, life-saving vaccinations as the head of the anti-vaccine organization he founded, Children’s Health Defense, and spread misinformation and conspiracy theories. Upon seeking the confirmation, he transferred his trademark application to an LLC managed by Del Bigtree, another prominent anti-vaccine advocate who has spread conspiracy theories.

“A sicker America”: Senate confirms Robert F. Kennedy Jr. as health secretary Read More »

dragonsweeper-is-my-favorite-game-of-2025-(so-far)

Dragonsweeper is my favorite game of 2025 (so far)

While writing a wide-ranging history of Windows Minesweeper for Boss Fight Books in 2023, I ended up playing many variations of Microsoft’s beloved original game. Those include versions with hexagonal tiles, versions with weird board shapes, and versions that extend Minesweeper into four dimensions or more, to name just a few.

Almost all these variants messed a little too much with the careful balance of simplicity, readability, reasoning, and luck that made the original Minesweeper so addictive. None of them became games I return to day after day.

But then I stumbled onto Dragonsweeper, a free browser-based game that indie developer Daniel Benmergui released unceremoniously on itch.io last month. In the weeks since I discovered it, the game has become my latest puzzle obsession, filling in a worrying proportion of my spare moments with its addictive, simple RPG-tinged take on the Minesweeper formula.

Exploresweeper

Like Minesweeper before it, Dragonsweeper is a game about deducing hidden information based on the limited information you can already see on the grid. But the numbers you reveal in Dragonsweeper don’t simply tell you the number of threats on adjacent squares. Instead, the “numbers are sum of monster power,” as the game’s cryptic “Monsternomicon” explains. So a revealed square with a “14” could suggest two 7-power devils nearby or two 5-power slimes and a 4-power ogre, or even seven 2-power bats in a particularly weird randomized arrangement.

Destroying those monsters means eating into your avatar Jorge’s health total, which is prominently displayed in the bottom-left corner. Jorge’s health can safely go down to zero hearts without dying—which feels a bit counter-intuitive at first—and can be restored by using discovered health potions or by leveling up with gold accumulated from downed monsters and items. If you can level up enough without dying, you’ll have the health necessary to defeat the titular dragon sitting in the middle of the board and win the game.

Dragonsweeper is my favorite game of 2025 (so far) Read More »

centurylink-nightmares:-users-keep-asking-ars-for-help-with-multi-month-outages

CenturyLink nightmares: Users keep asking Ars for help with multi-month outages


More CenturyLink horror stories

Three more tales of CenturyLink failing to fix outages until hearing from Ars.

Horror poster take on the classic White Zombie about Century Link rendering the internet powerless

Credit: Aurich Lawson | White Zombie (Public Domain)

Credit: Aurich Lawson | White Zombie (Public Domain)

CenturyLink hasn’t broken its annoying habit of leaving customers without service for weeks or months and repeatedly failing to show up for repair appointments.

We’ve written about CenturyLink’s failure to fix long outages several times in the past year and a half. In each case, desperate customers contacted Ars because the telecom provider didn’t reconnect their service. And each time, CenturyLink finally sprang into action and fixed the problems shortly after hearing from an Ars reporter.

Unfortunately, it keeps happening, and CenturyLink (also known as Lumen) can’t seem to explain why. In only the last two months, we heard from CenturyLink customers in three states who were without service for periods of between three weeks and over four months.

In early December, we heard from John in Boulder, Colorado, who preferred that we not publish his last name. John said he and his wife had been without CenturyLink phone and DSL Internet service for over three weeks.

“There’s no cell service where we live, so we have to drive to find service… We’ve scheduled repairs [with CenturyLink] three different times, but each time nobody showed up, emailed, or called,” he told us. They pay $113 a month for phone and DSL service, he said.

John also told us his elderly neighbors were without service. He read our February 2024 article about a 39-day outage in Oregon and wondered if we could help. We also published an August 2023 article about CenturyLink leaving an 86-year-old woman in Minnesota with no Internet service for a month and a May 2024 article about CenturyLink leaving a couple in Oregon with no service for two months, then billing them for $239.

We contacted CenturyLink about the outages affecting John and his neighbor, providing both addresses to the company. Service for both was fixed several hours later. Suddenly, a CenturyLink “repair person showed up today, replaced both the modem and the phone card in the nearest pedestal, and we are reconnected to the rest of the world,” John told us.

John said he also messaged a CenturyLink technician whose contact information he saved from a previous visit for a different matter. It turned out this technician had been promoted to area supervisor, so John’s outreach to him may also have contributed to the belated fix. However it happened, CenturyLink confirmed to Ars that service was restored for both John and his neighbor on the same day,

“Good news, we were able to restore service to both customers today,” a company spokesperson told us. “One had a modem issue, which needed to be replaced, and the other had a problem with their line.”

What were you waiting for?

After getting confirmation that the outages were fixed, we asked the CenturyLink spokesperson whether the company has “a plan to make sure that customer outages are always fixed when a customer contacts the company instead of waiting for a reporter to contact the company on the customer’s behalf weeks later.”

Here is the answer we got from CenturyLink: “Restoring customer service is a priority, and we apologized for the delay. We’re looking at why there was a repair delay.”

It appears that nothing has changed. Even as John’s problem was fixed, CenturyLink users in other states suffered even longer outages, and no one showed up for scheduled repair appointments. These outages weren’t fixed until late January—and only after the customers contacted us to ask for help.

Karen Kurt, a resident of Sheridan, Oregon, emailed us on January 23 to report that she had no CenturyLink DSL Internet service since November 4, 2024. One of her neighbors was also suffering through the months-long outage.

“We have set up repair tickets only to have them voided and/or canceled,” Kurt told us. “We have sat at home on the designated repair day from 8–5 pm, and no one shows up.” Kurt’s CenturyLink phone and Internet service costs $172.04 a month, according to a recent bill she provided us. Kurt said she also has frequent CenturyLink phone outages, including some stretches that occurred during the three-month Internet outage.

Separately, a CenturyLink customer named David Stromberg in Bellevue, Washington, told us that his phone service had been out since September 16. He repeatedly scheduled repair appointments, but the scheduled days went by with no repairs. “Every couple weeks, they do this and the tech doesn’t show up,” he said.

“Quick” fixes

As far as we can tell, there weren’t any complex technical problems preventing CenturyLink from ending these outages. Once the public relations department heard from Ars, CenturyLink sent technicians to each area, and the customers had their services restored.

On the afternoon of January 24, we contacted CenturyLink about the outage affecting Kurt and her neighbor. CenturyLink restored service for both houses less than three hours later, finally ending outages that lasted over 11 weeks.

On Sunday, January 26, we informed CenturyLink’s public relations team about the outage affecting Stromberg in Washington. Service was restored about 48 hours later, ending the phone outage that lasted well over four months.

As we’ve done in previous cases, we asked CenturyLink why the outages lasted so long and why the company repeatedly failed to show up for repair appointments. We did not receive any substantive answer. “Services have been restored, and appropriate credits will be provided,” the CenturyLink spokesperson replied.

Stromberg said getting the credit wasn’t so simple. “We contacted them after service was restored. They credited the full amount, but it took a few phone calls. They also gave us a verbal apology,” he told us. He said they pay $80.67 a month for CenturyLink phone service and that they get Internet access from Comcast.

Kurt said she had to call CenturyLink each month the outage dragged on to obtain a bill credit. Though the outage is over, she said her Internet access has been unreliable since the fix, with webpages often taking painfully long times to load.

Kurt has only a 1.5Mbps DSL connection, so it’s not a modern Internet connection even on a good day. CenturyLink told us it found no further problems on its end, so it appears that Kurt is stuck with what she has for now.

Desperation

“We are just desperate,” Kurt told us when she first reached out. Kurt, a retired teacher, said she and her husband were driving to a library to access the Internet and help grandchildren with schoolwork. She said there’s no reliable cell service in the area and that they are on a waiting list for Starlink satellite service.

Kurt said her husband once suggested they switch to a different Internet provider, and she pointed out that there aren’t any better options. On the Starlink website, entering their address shows they are in an area labeled as sold out.

Although repair appointments came and went without a fix, Kurt said she received emails from CenturyLink falsely claiming that service had been restored. Kurt said she spoke with technicians doing work nearby and asked if CenturyLink is trying to force people to drop the service because it doesn’t want to serve the area anymore.

Kurt said a technician replied that there are some areas CenturyLink doesn’t want to serve anymore but that her address isn’t on that list. A technician explained that they have too much work, she said.

CenturyLink has touted its investments in modern fiber networks but hasn’t upgraded the old copper lines in Kurt’s area and many others.

“This is DSL. No fiber here!” Kurt told us. “Sometimes when things are congested, you can make a sandwich while things download. I have been told that is because this area is like a glass of water. At first, there were only a few of us drinking out of the glass. Now, CenturyLink has many more customers drinking out of that same glass, and so things are slower/congested at various times of the day.”

Kurt said the service tends to work better in mid-morning, early afternoon, after 9 pm on weeknights, and on weekends. “Sometimes pages take a bit of time to load. That is especially frustrating while doing school work with my grandson and granddaughter,” she said.

CenturyLink Internet even slower than expected

After the nearly three-month outage ended, Kurt told us on January 27 that “many times, we will get Internet back for two or three days, only to lose it again.” This seemed to be what happened on Sunday, February 2, when Kurt told us her Internet stopped working again and that she couldn’t reach a human at CenturyLink. She restarted the router but could not open webpages.

We followed up with CenturyLink’s public relations department again, but this time, the company said its network was performing as expected. “We ran a check and called Karen regarding her service,” CenturyLink told us on February 3. “Everything looks good on our end, with no problems reported since the 24th. She mentioned that she could access some sites, but the speed seemed really slow. We reminded her that she has a 1.5Mbps service. Karen acknowledged this but felt it was slower than expected.”

Kurt told us that her Internet is currently slower than it was before the outage. “Before October, at least the webpages loaded,” she said. Now, “the pages either do not load, continue to attempt to load, or finally time out.”

While Kurt is suffering from a lack of broadband competition, municipalities sometimes build public broadband networks when private companies fail to adequately serve their residents. ISPs such as CenturyLink have lobbied against these efforts to expand broadband access.

In May 2024, we wrote about how public broadband advocates say they’ve seen a big increase in opposition from “dark money” groups that don’t have to reveal their donors. At the time, CenturyLink did not answer questions about specific donations but defended its opposition to government-operated networks.

“We know it will take everyone working together to close the digital divide,” CenturyLink told us then. “That’s why we partner with municipalities on their digital inclusion efforts by providing middle-mile infrastructure that supports last-mile networks. We have and will continue to raise legitimate concerns when government-owned networks create an anti-competitive environment. There needs to be a level playing field when it comes to permitting, right-of-way fees, and cross subsidization of costs.”

Stuck with CenturyLink

Kurt said that CenturyLink has set a “low bar” for its service, and it isn’t even meeting that low standard. “I do not use the Internet a lot. I do not use the Internet for gaming or streaming things. The Internet here would never be able to do that. But I do expect the pages to load properly and fully,” she said.

Kurt said she and her husband live in a house they built in 2007 and originally were led to believe that Verizon service would be available. “Prior to purchasing the property, we did our due diligence and sought out all utility providers… Verizon insisted it was their territory on at least two occasions,” she said.

But when it was time to install phone and Internet lines, it turned out Verizon didn’t serve the location, she said. This is another problem we’ve written about multiple times—ISPs incorrectly claiming to offer service in an area, only to admit they don’t after a resident moves in. (Verizon sold its Oregon wireline operations to Frontier in 2010.)

“We were stuck with CenturyLink,” and “CenturyLink did not offer Internet when we first built this home,” Kurt said. They subscribed to satellite Internet offered by WildBlue, which was acquired by ViaSat in 2009. They used satellite for several years until they could get CenturyLink’s DSL Internet.

Now they’re hoping to replace CenturyLink with Starlink, which uses low-Earth orbit satellites that offer faster service than older satellite services. They’re on the waiting list for Starlink and are interested in Amazon’s Kuiper satellite service, which isn’t available yet.

“We are hoping one of these two vendors will open up a spot for us and we can move our Internet over to satellite,” Kurt said. “We have also heard that Starlink and Amazon are going to be starting up phone service as well as Internet. That would truly be a gift to us. If we could move all of our services over to something reliable, our life would be made so much easier.”

Not enough technicians for copper network

John, the Colorado resident who had a three-week CenturyLink outage, said his default DSL speed is 10Mbps downstream and 2Mbps upstream. He doubled that by getting a second dedicated line to create a bonded connection, he said.

When John set up repair appointments during the outage, the “dates came and went without the typical ‘your tech’s on their way’ email, without anyone showing up,” he said. John said he repeatedly called CenturyLink and was told there was a bad cable that was being fixed.

“Every time I called, I’d get somebody who said that it was a bad cable and it was being fixed. Every single time, they’d say it would be fixed by 11 pm the following day,” he said. “It wasn’t, so I’d call again. I asked to talk with a supervisor, but that was always denied. Every time, they said they’d expedite the request. The people I talked with were all very nice and very apologetic about our outage, but they clearly stayed in their box.”

John still had the contact information for the CenturyLink technician who set up his bonded connection and messaged him around the same time he contacted Ars. When a CenturyLink employee finally showed up to fix the problem, he “found that our DSL was out because our modem was bad, and the phone was out because there was a bad dial-tone card in the closest pedestal. It took this guy less than an hour to get us back working—and it wasn’t a broken cable,” John said.

John praised CenturyLink’s local repair team but said his requests for repairs apparently weren’t routed to the right people. A CenturyLink manager told John that the local crew never got the repair ticket from the phone-based customer service team, he said.

The technician who fixed the service offered some insight into the local problems, John told us. “He said that in the mountains of western Boulder County, there are a total of five techs who know how to work with copper wire,” John told us. “All the other employees only work with fiber. CenturyLink is losing the people familiar with copper and not replacing them, even though copper is what the west half of the county depends on.”

Lumen says it has 1.08 million fiber broadband subscribers and 1.47 million “other broadband subscribers,” defined as “customers that primarily subscribe to lower speed copper-based broadband services marketed under the CenturyLink brand.”

John doesn’t know whether his copper line will ever be upgraded to fiber. His house is 1.25 miles from the nearest fiber box. “I wonder if they’ll eventually replace lines like the one to our house or if they’ll drop us as customers when the copper line eventually degrades to the point it’s not usable,” he said.

Photo of Jon Brodkin

Jon is a Senior IT Reporter for Ars Technica. He covers the telecom industry, Federal Communications Commission rulemakings, broadband consumer affairs, court cases, and government regulation of the tech industry.

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boeing-has-informed-its-employees-that-nasa-may-cancel-sls-contracts

Boeing has informed its employees that NASA may cancel SLS contracts

The primary contractor for the Space Launch System rocket, Boeing, is preparing for the possibility that NASA cancels the long-running program.

On Friday, with less than an hour’s notice, David Dutcher, Boeing’s vice president and program manager for the SLS rocket, scheduled an all-hands meeting for the approximately 800 employees working on the program. The apparently scripted meeting lasted just six minutes, and Dutcher didn’t take questions.

During his remarks, Dutcher said Boeing’s contracts for the rocket could end in March and that the company was preparing for layoffs in case the contracts with the space agency were not renewed. “Cold and scripted” is how one person described Dutcher’s demeanor.

Giving a 60-day notice

The aerospace company, which is the primary contractor for the rocket’s large core stage, issued the notifications as part of the Worker Adjustment and Retraining Notification (or WARN) Act, which requires US employers with 100 or more full-time employees to provide a 60-day notice in advance of mass layoffs or plant closings.

“To align with revisions to the Artemis program and cost expectations, today we informed our Space Launch Systems team of the potential for approximately 400 fewer positions by April 2025,” a Boeing spokesperson told Ars. “This will require 60-day notices of involuntary layoff be issued to impacted employees in coming weeks, in accordance with the Worker Adjustment and Retraining Notification Act. We are working with our customer and seeking opportunities to redeploy employees across our company to minimize job losses and retain our talented teammates.”

The timing of Friday’s hastily called meeting aligns with the anticipated release of President Trump’s budget proposal for fiscal year 2026. This may not be an entire plan but rather a “skinny” budget that lays out a wish list of spending requests for Congress and some basic economic projections. Congress does not have to act on Trump’s budget priorities.

Boeing has informed its employees that NASA may cancel SLS contracts Read More »

doge-can’t-use-student-loan-data-to-dismantle-the-education-dept.,-lawsuit-says

DOGE can’t use student loan data to dismantle the Education Dept., lawsuit says

Microsoft declined to comment, but allegedly the DOGE employees are “using AI software accessed through Microsoft’s cloud computing service Azure to pore over every dollar of money the department disburses, from contracts to grants to work trip expenses,” one source told the Post.

The lawsuit noted that several DOE employees have tried to block DOGE’s access by raising red flags up the command chain, but DOE leadership directly instructed lower-level employees to grant DOGE access, the same source alleged.

A big concern is that DOGE funneling education data into AI systems will cause sensitive data to be stored in a way that makes it more vulnerable to cyberattacks or data breaches. Another issue could be the AI system being error-prone or potentially hallucinating data that is driving decisions on major DOE cuts.

On Thursday, a DOE deputy assistant secretary for communications, Madi Biedermann, issued a statement insisting that DOGE employees are federal employees who have undergone background checks to be granted requisite security clearances.

“There is nothing inappropriate or nefarious going on,” Biedermann said.

Trump has similarly waved away concerns over DOGE’s work at DOE and other departments that officials worry are experiencing a “blitz” of seemingly unlawful power grabs, the Post reported. On Monday, Trump told reporters that “if there’s a conflict” with DOGE accessing Americans’ data, “then we won’t let him get near it.” But seemingly until Trump agrees there’s a conflict, Musk’s work with DOGE must go on, Trump said.

“We’re trying to shrink government, and he can probably shrink it as well as anybody else, if not better,” Trump suggested.

While thousands of Americans are suing, confused over whether they need to urgently protect their private financial data, one DOE staffer told the Post that DOGE “is working with almost unbelievable speed.” The staffer ominously suggested that it may already be too late to protect Americans from invasive probes or defend departments against cuts.

“They have a playbook, which is to get access to the data,” the staffer told the Post. “And once they’re in, it’s already over.”

DOGE can’t use student loan data to dismantle the Education Dept., lawsuit says Read More »

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Nintendo patent explains Switch 2 Joy-Cons’ “mouse operation” mode

It’s been a month since we first heard rumors that the Switch 2’s new Joy-Cons could be slid across a flat surface to function like a computer mouse. Now, a newly published patent filed by Nintendo seems to confirm that feature and describes how it will work.

The international patent was filed with the World Intellectual Property Organization in January 2023, but it was only published on WIPO’s website on Thursday. The Japanese-language patent—whose illustrations match what we’ve seen of Switch 2 Joy-Con precisely—features an English abstract describing “a sensor for mouse operation” that can “detect reflected light from a detected surface, the light changing by moving over the detected surface…” much like any number of optical computer mice. Schematic drawings in the patent show how the light source and light sensor are squeezed inside the Joy-Con, with a built-in lens for directing the light to and from each.

A schematic diagram of the Switch 2’s Joy-Con light sensor

A schematic diagram of the Switch 2’s Joy-Con light sensor Credit: Nintendo / WIPO

A machine translation of the full text of the patent describes the controller as “a novel input device that can be used as a mouse and other than a mouse.” In mouse mode, as described in the patent, the user cradles the outer edge of the controller with their palm and places the inner edge “on, for example, a desk or the like.”

In this configuration, the user’s thumb can still access the analog stick (which is now pointing horizontally) while the index and middle fingers are positioned so the two shoulder buttons “can be operated as, for example, a right-click button and a left-click button,” according to the patent. The patent describes this configuration as “easy to hold” or “easy to grip.” It also goes to great lengths to explain how the shoulder buttons wrap around the curved top corner of the controller and thus are “easy to press” by pushing either downward or closer to horizontally with a finger.

Nintendo patent explains Switch 2 Joy-Cons’ “mouse operation” mode Read More »

don’t-panic,-but-an-asteroid-has-a-1.9%-chance-of-hitting-earth-in-2032

Don’t panic, but an asteroid has a 1.9% chance of hitting Earth in 2032


More data will likely reduce the chance of an impact to zero. If not, we have options.

Discovery images of asteroid 2024 YR4. Credit: ATLAS

Something in the sky captured the attention of astronomers in the final days of 2024. A telescope in Chile scanning the night sky detected a faint point of light, and it didn’t correspond to any of the thousands of known stars, comets, and asteroids in astronomers’ all-sky catalog.

The detection on December 27 came from one of a network of telescopes managed by the Asteroid Terrestrial-impact Last Alert System (ATLAS), a NASA-funded project to provide warning of asteroids on a collision course with Earth.

Within a few days, scientists gathered enough information on the asteroid—officially designated 2024 YR4—to determine that its orbit will bring it quite close to Earth in 2028, and then again in 2032. Astronomers ruled out any chance of an impact with Earth in 2028, but there’s a small chance the asteroid might hit our planet on December 22, 2032.

How small? The probability has fluctuated in recent days, but as of Thursday, NASA’s Center for Near Earth Object Studies estimated a 1.9 percent chance of an impact with Earth in 2032. The European Space Agency (ESA) put the probability at 1.8 percent. So as of now, NASA believes there’s a 1-in-53 chance of 2024 YR4 striking Earth. That’s about twice as likely as the lifetime risk of dying in a motor vehicle crash, according to the National Safety Council.

These numbers are slightly higher than the probabilities published last month, when ESA estimated a 1.2 percent chance of an impact. In a matter of weeks or months, the number will likely drop to zero.

No surprise here, according to ESA.

“It is important to remember that an asteroid’s impact probability often rises at first before quickly dropping to zero after additional observations,” ESA said in a press release. The agency released a short explainer video, embedded below, showing how an asteroid’s cone of uncertainty shrinks as scientists get a better idea of its trajectory.

Refining the risk

Scientists estimate that 2024 YR4 is between 130 to 300 feet (40 and 90 meters) wide, large enough to cause localized devastation near the impact site. The asteroid responsible for the Tunguska event of 1908, which leveled some 500 square miles (1,287 square kilometers) of forest in remote Siberia, was probably about the same size. The meteor that broke apart in the sky over Chelyabinsk, Russia, in 2013 was about 20 meters wide.

Astronomers use the Torino scale for measuring the risk of potential asteroid impacts. Asteroid 2024 YR4 is now rated at Level 3 on this scale, meaning it merits close attention from astronomers, the public, and government officials. This is the second time an asteroid has reached this level since the scale’s adoption in 1999. The other case happened in 2004, when asteroid Apophis briefly reached a Level 4 rating until further observations of the asteroid eliminated any chance of an impact with the Earth in 2029.

In the unlikely event that it impacts the Earth, an asteroid the size of 2024 YR4 could cause blast damage as far as 30 miles (50 kilometers) from the location of the impact or airburst if the object breaks apart in the atmosphere, according to the International Asteroid Warning Network (IAWN), established in the aftermath of the Chelyabinsk event.

The asteroid warning network is affiliated with the United Nations. Officials activate the IAWN when an asteroid bigger than 10 meters has a greater than 1 percent chance of striking Earth within the next 20 years. The risk of 2024 YR4 meets this threshold.

The red points on this image show the possible locations of asteroid 2024 YR4 on December 22, 2032, as projected by a Monte Carlo simulation. As this image shows, most of the simulations project the asteroid missing the Earth. Credit: ESA/Planetary Defense Office

Determining the asteroid’s exact size will be difficult. Scientists would need deep space radar observations, thermal infrared observations, or imagery from a spacecraft that could closely approach the asteroid, according to the IAWN. The asteroid won’t come close enough to Earth for deep space radar observations until shortly before its closest approach in 2032.

Astronomers need numerous observations to precisely plot an asteroid’s motion through the Solar System. Over time, these observations will reduce uncertainty and narrow the corridor the asteroid will follow as it comes near Earth.

Scientists already know a little about asteroid 2024 YR4’s orbit, which follows an elliptical path around the Sun. The orbit brings the asteroid inside of Earth’s orbit at its closest point to the Sun and then into the outer part of the asteroid belt when it is farthest from the Sun.

But there’s a complication in astronomers’ attempts to nail down the asteroid’s path. The object is currently moving away from Earth in almost a straight line. This makes it difficult to accurately determine its orbit by studying how its trajectory curves over time, according to ESA.

It also means observers will need to use larger telescopes to see the asteroid before it becomes too distant to see it from Earth in April. By the end of this year’s observing window, the asteroid warning network says the impact probability could increase to a couple tens of percent, or it could more likely drop back below the notification threshold (1 percent impact probability).

“It is possible that asteroid 2024 YR4 will fade from view before we are able to entirely rule out any chance of impact in 2032,” ESA said. “In this case, the asteroid will likely remain on ESA’s risk list until it becomes observable again in 2028.”

Planetary defenders

This means that public officials might need to start planning what to do later this year.

For the first time, an international board called the Space Mission Planning Advisory Group met this week to discuss what we can do to respond to the risk of an asteroid impact. This group, known as SMPAG, coordinates planning among representatives from the world’s space agencies, including NASA, ESA, China, and Russia.

The group decided on Monday to give astronomers a few more months to refine their estimates of the asteroid’s orbit before taking action. They will meet again in late April or early May or earlier if the impact risk increases significantly. If there’s still a greater than 1 percent probability of 2024 YR4 hitting the Earth, the group will issue a recommendation for further action to the United Nations Office for Outer Space Affairs.

So what are the options? If the data in a few months still shows that the asteroid poses a hazard to Earth, it will be time for the world’s space agencies to consider a deflection mission. NASA demonstrated its ability to alter the orbit of an asteroid in 2022 with a first-of-its-kind experiment in space. The mission, called DART, put a small spacecraft on a collision course with an asteroid two to four times larger than 2024 YR4.

The kinetic energy from the spacecraft’s death dive into the asteroid was enough to slightly nudge the object off its natural orbit around a nearby larger asteroid. This proved that an asteroid deflection mission could work if scientists have enough time to design and build it, an undertaking that took about five years for DART.

Italy’s LICIACube spacecraft snapped this image of asteroids Didymos (lower left) and Dimorphos (upper right) a few minutes after the impact of DART on September 26, 2022. Credit: ASI/NASA

A deflection mission is most effective well ahead of an asteroid’s potential encounter with the Earth, so it’s important not to wait until the last minute.

Fans of Hollywood movies know there’s a nuclear option for dealing with an asteroid coming toward us. The drawback of using a nuclear warhead is that it could shatter one large asteroid into many smaller objects, although recent research suggests a more distant nuclear explosion could produce enough X-ray radiation to push an asteroid off a collision course.

Waiting for additional observations in 2028 would leave little time to develop a deflection mission. Therefore, in the unlikely event that the risk of an impact rises over the next few months, it will be time for officials to start seriously considering the possibility of an intervention.

Even without a deflection, there’s plenty of time for government officials to do something here on Earth. It should be possible for authorities to evacuate any populations that might be affected by the asteroid.

The asteroid could devastate an area the size of a large city, but any impact is most likely to happen in a remote region or in the ocean. The risk corridor for 2024 YR4 extends from the eastern Pacific Ocean to northern South America, the Atlantic Ocean, Africa, the Arabian Sea, and South Asia.

There’s an old joke that dinosaurs went extinct because they didn’t have a space program. Whatever happens in 2032, we’re not at risk of extinction. However, occasions like this are exactly why most Americans think we should have a space program. A 2019 poll showed that 68 percent of Americans considered it very or extremely important for the space program to monitor asteroids, comets, or other objects from space that could strike the planet.

In contrast, about a quarter of those polled placed such importance on returning astronauts to the Moon or sending people to Mars. The cost of monitoring and deflecting asteroids is modest compared to the expensive undertakings of human missions to the Moon and Mars.

From taxpayers’ point of view, it seems this part of NASA offers the greatest bang for their buck.

Photo of Stephen Clark

Stephen Clark is a space reporter at Ars Technica, covering private space companies and the world’s space agencies. Stephen writes about the nexus of technology, science, policy, and business on and off the planet.

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robocallers-posing-as-fcc-staff-blocked-after-robocalling-real-fcc-staff

Robocallers posing as FCC staff blocked after robocalling real FCC staff


A not-very-successful robocall scheme

You can ignore robocalls from FCC “Fraud Prevention Team,” which doesn’t exist.

Credit: Getty Images | PhonlamaiPhoto

Robocallers posing as employees of the Federal Communications Commission made the mistake of trying to scam real employees of the FCC, the FCC announced yesterday. “On the night of February 6, 2024, and continuing into the morning of February 7, 2024, over a dozen FCC staff and some of their family members reported receiving calls on their personal and work telephone numbers,” the FCC said.

The calls used an artificial voice that said, “Hello [first name of recipient] you are receiving an automated call from the Federal Communications Commission notifying you the Fraud Prevention Team would like to speak with you. If you are available to speak now please press one. If you prefer to schedule a call back please press two.”

You may not be surprised to learn that the FCC does not have any “Fraud Prevention Team” like the one mentioned in the robocalls, and especially not one that demands Google gift cards in lieu of jail time.

“The FCC’s Enforcement Bureau believes the purpose of the calls was to threaten, intimidate, and defraud,” the agency said. “One recipient of an imposter call reported that they were ultimately connected to someone who ‘demand[ed] that [they] pay the FCC $1,000 in Google gift cards to avoid jail time for [their] crimes against the state.'”

The FCC said it does not “publish or otherwise share staff personal phone numbers” and that it “remains unclear how these individuals were targeted.” Obviously, robocallers posing as FCC employees probably wouldn’t intentionally place scam calls to real FCC employees. But FCC employees are just as likely to get robocalls as anyone else. This set of schemers apparently only made about 1,800 calls before their calling accounts were terminated.

The FCC described the scheme yesterday when it announced a proposed fine of $4,492,500 against Telnyx, the voice service provider accused of carrying the robocalls. The FCC alleges that Telnyx violated “Know Your Customer (KYC)” rules by providing access to calling services without verifying the customers’ identities. When contacted by Ars today, Telnyx denied the FCC’s allegations and said it will contest the proposed fine.

The “MarioCop” accounts

The robocalling scheme lasted two days. On February 6, 2024, Telnyx accepted two new customers calling themselves Christian Mitchell and Henry Walker, who provided street addresses in Toronto and email addresses with the domain name “mariocop123.com.” The robocallers apparently used fake identities and paid for Telnyx service in Bitcoin.

The Telnyx customers who placed the robocalls are referred to as “MarioCop accounts” in the FCC’s Notice of Apparent Liability for Forfeiture (NAL) issued against Telnyx. Telnyx flagged one of the accounts in the course of its “routine examination of new users” and terminated the account on February 7 after determining the calls violated its terms and conditions and acceptable use policy. Telnyx also reported the account to the FCC.

Telnyx is based in Chicago. It offers a service that lets callers “build a custom AI voice bot” and a voice API that “makes it simple to make, receive and control voice calls with code.” Telnyx is also a VoIP provider that says it “holds carrier status in 30+ countries around the world” and offers “local calling in over 80 countries and PSTN [Public Switched Telephone Network] replacement in 45+ markets.”

The FCC subpoenaed Telnyx for information about the calls, and the resulting records showed that one MarioCop account placed 1,029 calls between February 6 and February 7. The other account placed 768 calls on February 6.

The FCC also subpoenaed Telnyx for information that might identify the callers and “determined that the very limited identifying information Telnyx collected from its customers was false.” They used physical addresses in Canada, including one that turned out to be a Sheraton hotel, and IP addresses from Scotland and England.

“The @mariocop123.com domain is not associated with any known business; a website using the same domain was created in February 2024 and remains undeveloped,” the FCC said. The FCC notes that both MarioCop accounts may have been operated by the same person.

FCC: Telcos must know their customers

Telnyx “accepted the names and physical addresses at face value, without any further requests for corroboration or independent verification,” the FCC forfeiture order said. Neither applicant provided a telephone number.

The FCC alleged that Telnyx didn’t do enough “to discern whether the limited amount of identifying information its customer provided was legitimate and it overlooked obvious discrepancies in the information it collected… Becoming Telynyx’s customer and gaining access to outbound calling services that allowed origination of hundreds of calls (more than 1,000 calls from the First MarioCop Account) was as simple as making up a fake name and address and acquiring a non-free email address.”

The FCC notice continued:

Our rules require Telnyx to know its customers. Yet it did not know who the MarioCop Account holders were. We therefore conclude that Telnyx apparently violated section 64.1200(n)(4) of our rules by allowing the First MarioCop Account and the Second MarioCop Account access to outbound calling services without actually knowing the true identities of the account holders. By extension, we believe we could likely find that Telnyx apparently violated our rules with regards to every customer it onboarded using the same process as it did for the MarioCop Accounts. We decline to do so here absent further investigation.

Telnyx will have an opportunity to respond to the allegations and argue that it shouldn’t be fined. In some cases, the FCC and the telecom reach a settlement for a lower amount.

Telnyx CEO David Casem told Ars today that “Telnyx is surprised by the FCC’s mistaken decision to issue a Notice of Apparent Liability stating an intent to impose monetary penalties. The Notice of Apparent Liability is factually mistaken, and Telnyx denies its allegations. Telnyx has done everything and more than the FCC has required for Know-Your-Customer (‘KYC’) and customer due diligence procedures.”

We also sent a message to the email addresses used by the MarioCop accounts and will update this article in the unlikely event that we receive a response.

Telnyx defends response, citing quick shutdown

Casem said the FCC hasn’t previously demanded “perfection” in stopping illegal traffic. “Since bad actors continuously find ways to avoid detection, the FCC has historically expected providers to take reasonable steps to detect and block them,” he told Ars. “Yet the FCC now seeks to impose substantial monetary penalties on Telnyx for limited unlawful calling activity that Telnyx not only did not originate but swiftly blocked within a matter of hours.”

Casem said that “there has been no allegation of subsequent recurring activity” and urged the FCC to “reconsider what can only be viewed as an improper effort to impose an unprecedented zero-tolerance requirement on providers through enforcement action, in the absence of any defined rules informing providers what is expected of them.”

FCC Chairman Brendan Carr said in yesterday’s announcement that he is pleased with the “bipartisan vote in favor of this nearly $4.5 million proposed fine” and that it “continues the FCC’s longstanding work to stop bad actors.”

Anna Gomez, a Democratic member of the FCC, said that Carr’s office accepted her request for a change designed to encourage telecoms to report potential violations to the FCC. “It is important that service providers work quickly and closely with the FCC to identify and stop illegal traffic before it makes its way to consumers. I value self-reporting from industry actors on potential violations of our rules, and I am grateful the Office of Chairman Carr accepted our edits to this NAL to encourage self-reporting,” Gomez said.

There was a dissenting vote from Republican Commissioner Nathan Simington, but not because of the facts specific to this case. Because of a recent Supreme Court ruling limiting the power of federal agencies, Simington has vowed to vote against any fine imposed by the commission until its legal powers are clear.

“While the conduct described in this NAL is particularly egregious and certainly worth enforcement action, I continue to believe that the Supreme Court’s decision in Jarkesy prevents me from voting, at this time, to approve this or any item purporting to impose a fine,” Simington said.

Photo of Jon Brodkin

Jon is a Senior IT Reporter for Ars Technica. He covers the telecom industry, Federal Communications Commission rulemakings, broadband consumer affairs, court cases, and government regulation of the tech industry.

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Drones are now launching drones to attack other drones in Ukraine

Radio mast

The Ukrainian military is talking up a new ground drone called the Pliushch, which doesn’t carry a weapon but instead features a folded, 10-meter (32-foot) tall radio mast. The drone has a range of 40 km (25 miles), and once in position, it can raise the radio mast, which can be used either as a communications repeater or as a mobile electronic warfare station.

The future of drone combat

These examples are really just a partial list—it doesn’t even touch on the continually updated naval drones that Ukraine continues to deploy in the Black Sea—and for every new innovation, there will shortly be a counter-innovation. Case in point: electronic warfare has now saturated front-line combat areas in Ukraine and Russia and, in some places, is so bad that fiber optic drones are now used to avoid its effects. (These drones unspool miles of ultra-thin fiber-optic cable behind them as they fly, which provides a high-quality, unjammable video and control channel to the drone.)

Because fiber optic drones lack the electromagnetic transmissions that can make drones easy to pinpoint, new methods (including short-range radar systems) are now used to hunt them down, while quick-reaction units will use small attack drones to hit the fiber optic drone before it reaches its target.

Given the many kinds of drone hardware available, you might wonder why more assaults don’t rely on machines rather than humans. Now that ground drones are entering the fight in greater numbers, this does appear to be happening. For instance, local news reports from Ukraine in December described how the Khartia brigade of the Ukrainian National Guard attacked Russian positions using only a mix of machine gun ground drones, aerial attack drones, and mine-laying/clearing drones.

Drones are now launching drones to attack other drones in Ukraine Read More »